Reflections on my run

This morning, the Lord provided me with a great opportunity. An opportunity my sweet friend Amanda reminded me about two months ago. An opportunity to wake up early, lace up my tennis shoes, and head towards a starting line, waiting for a bell to sound the start at 7:30 am. Maybe not an opportunity that sounds "great" to you, but for me, I could hardly sleep last night. You see, while my body stays in motion, I tend to hear so clearly from Him, tend to feel so close to Him, tend to pay attention and keep my eyes open for Him, that my anticipation was sky high.

We began the day with a ride from Mr. Dave and his fabulous new truck (aka, Amanda's husband). He dropped us off because this race started at one point, and finished 13.1 miles down Riverside Dr. We had a day to run along the river with several elite athletes from different countries (not that we saw them past the starting line :), with the sun shining, and the course mostly downhill (bonus!) I, however, had one new item with me today...kleenex (borrowed from a very gracious Grandma before we started). Yep, last week I came down with a nasty sinus infection/allergy attack and needed to clear the "breathing-path" along the way. Ever try blowing your nose while running? Be prepared for a mess. Enough said. My mind couldn't help but think this morning of Misty May as I watched her battle a cold in an earlier match of the Olympics. I recall an announcer saying that many athletes attest to the fact that they play better "under the weather". This is the philosophy I wanted to adopt today.

We started the race 1/2 hour later than anticipated (due to late shuttle buses), but you'll have that in an inaugural first try. It actually gave us a chance to learn about some of the top athletes through the announcer, and to "bond" with the crowd around us pre-race - so many stories, so many amazing people. Ready, set, go - and we're off. Thanks to Amanda's pre-run drive and her magic watch, we were able to track our pace as we ran those first few miles. Actually, we were thrilled with our pace, able to keep on track even as we ran straight for the entire time.

About mile 8, I started to notice how my body was reacting to the distance, and sadly recognized I needed to walk through the next water station, so I encouraged Amanda to go ahead and run her race. As I began to run again, my body was needing a different pace this time... okay. I had 5 more to go, what to do? My mind ran straight to him. After waking this morning, I was drawn to reread again from Philippians 3, starting from verse 12.

12Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

These verses are ones in which I've put to memory, yet there is something about opening the Book and letting my eyes fall upon the words. I felt the Lord impress the words on me again - press on - just take that next step. He brought back to my mind some memories of training runs we traveled through together in preparation for today. He simply reminded me that my "race" on earth is not simply to the next "finish line", but actually until I draw my last breath. He splashed his encouragement all over me and around, just as with a physical sponge he provided, water splashed as I squeezed it over my head (pretty cool!) He even opened my eyes and provided companions along the way. A tall man with a red shirt caught my eye, and as I approached, we began to chat. Turns out we both grew up in the same area of Cleveland. Next thing I knew, a lady next to me joined in, a mom of teenagers, excited just to be a part of this race. Funny how those 2 miles flew by. I saw him in the faces of the many volunteers, I felt him prompting as I spoke with fellow runners, I felt his strength as he provided the endurance to continue. I'm so thankful.

My heart is just filled with thanks. Thanks, at that moment, to see the finish line and simply be able to cross it. Thanks for my amazing husband who was waiting with our three blessings to greet me. I knew in my head that I just finished running, but nothing could stop be from picking up my girls and giving them a squeeze. Thanks to Mr. Dave who hooked us up with a post-run massage - my muscles today were forever grateful. Thanks for the beautiful weather. Thanks for water. But mostly, I'm simply thankful for my Jesus, the living water, who pours forth his patience, grace, and mercy upon me daily. And not only for me, but for all those ready to receive.

Finally, I'd just like to lift up my prayers for all those in the path of Gustav. Amanda has family in New Orleans. Many have parents, siblings, grandparents, and children living there. May the Lord be glorified in all that takes place. May lives be changed in Him.

Persevering in prayer

Colossians 4:2

2Be earnest and unwearied and steadfast in your prayer [life], being [both] alert and intent in [your praying] with thanksgiving. (AMP)

Paul asks the Colossians to devote themselves to prayer. One who is devoted is faithful, persistent, and persevering. In our devotion to prayer, we are instructed to stay alert in our praying by having an attitude of thanksgiving. As my dear friend Krysty (check out her blog), reminded me last night, praise and thanksgiving are an essential part of persevering prayer. The more we focus on praising God, the more devoted and faithful we become.

Hannah is such a beautiful example of devoted prayer. Pause a moment and take a few seconds to read through her prayer of exultation, it's truly amazing (1 Samuel 2:1-10), or even pop over to biblegateway.com and click on "passage lookup". What great things she says of God. Did you notice how she gracefully overlooks the gift and praises the giver? How often we forget the giver and focus our attention only on the gift. Matthew Henry says, "Every stream should lead us to the fountain; and the favors we receive from God should raise our admiration of the infinite perfections there are in God."

Sometimes it's hard to pray. Sometimes we just don't feel like it. Sometimes we rather just escape, whether we "veg" in front of the TV, get lost in a book, or maybe take a nap. Sometimes we grow weary in praying for the same things over, and over, and over again. What then? May I humbly suggest that we wait quietly before God. Maybe we tell Him how cold and prayerless our hearts our, then look up to Him, trust Him, and expect Him to send the Holy Spirit to warm us up. I have a feeling that it won't be long before the glow of the Holy Spirit's presence will fill our hearts. Before long, we will begin to pray with freedom, directness, earnestness, and power.

In my experience, I am coming to learn that the blessings of such persevering prayer are unspeakable. There is nothing so heart-searching as the prayer of faith. "Honest talk" has taught me to discover and confess, which ultimately helps me let go of that which hinders the coming of blessings. It also reminds me to ask to see anything that may not be in accordance with His will. It has led me to closer fellowship with Him as he offers me guidance in how to pray. It's a kind of friendship talk that comes as naturally as breathing. Did it happen overnight? Nope. Like many things, it happens over time, with persistence and consistency.

David was a man after God's own heart, and his psalms are full of praises. My challenge to you today is to pray with him this prayer of gratitude, and perhaps write one of your own in your journal (you can do it!) God loves you and is so proud of you.

Psalm 52:8-9

8 But I am like an olive tree
flourishing in the house of God;
I trust in God's unfailing love
for ever and ever.

9 I will praise you forever for what you have done;
in your name I will hope, for your name is good.
I will praise you in the presence of your saints.

Another look at prayer

Prayer... one of those concepts that is inexhaustible. I'm sure I can spend a lifetime learning and still not come close to grasping the fact that I have obtained a pass to enter the "Holy of Holies", as the Old Testament states, to be able to commune with my Almighty Father. How did I gain this access? How did I earn this? How is it possible that I'm written, not only on his hand, but in the lamb's book of life for eternity? Not by anything this stinkin flesh deserves, but for only one reason. I have confessed my sins and I have asked Jesus to invade my life and heart. I am covered in the precious, protective blood of his son. Why? Simply because he loves me, he created me, and he wants me to walk with Him daily. In light of all of this, my "resonable service" (Romans 12:1) is to pursue more of my Jesus. I want to improve upon my communication skills (something I still strive for in my marriage, even after 11 years and counting :)

I'm currently reading a fabulous book called Becoming a Woman of Prayer, by Cynthia Heald, and the latest chapter I read is about intercessory prayer. Some fascinating stuff that I'd love to share! She begins with a quote from Oswald Chambers that has left me with thoughts to ponder. He states, "Vicarious intercession means that we deliberately substitute God's interests in others for our natural sympathy with them." I believe that we, at times, imagine that intercession means bringing our personal sympathies into the presence of God, in essence approaching Him with what we think is the best plan, our plan, which in turn demands that He do what we ask (ouch). Are we at times afraid to add the clause... your will be done? (John 17).

In a humble attempt to draw some connections, in essence, connect the dots as my friend Kristin says, let's take a look at the armor of God in relation to prayer. In Ephesians 6:10-18, the word praying is the climax of this whole epistle. Paul describes the man who does his most effective work in praying. There are six qualifications under the figure of the six pieces of armor. A clear understanding of truth (belt), a clean obedient life (breastplate), a strongly simple trust in God (feet), clear reassurance of one's own salvation and relation to God (helmet), and a good grip of truth for others (sword and shield). S.D. Gordon is quoted as saying, Such a man - praying - drives back these hosts of the traitor prince. Such a a man praying is invincible in his Chief, Jesus." Wow, I'm speechless.

I also loved the reminder that the bible is full of prayers to begin using on behalf of others (Ephesians. 3:14-21; Colossians 1:9-12; 2 Thessalonians 1:11-12), and over governing authorities (2 Chronicles 7:11-16; 1 Timothy 2:1-2). In reading these passages, my mind wandered to the age old question of why does God need our prayers? If He knows what is best for someone, why doesn't He just do it without involving us? Great questions, what is the truth? The example can be found in Jesus Christ (John 17) and his prayer, the dimension of oneness. He came not only to make us one with God, but to make us into oneness with each other. The reconciliation He died and rose to provide, and returned to impart, is both vertical and horizontal: it is with God and between us and others. May I humbly suggest that the Lord wants us to be to one another what He has been to us in love, forgiveness, and unlimited concern. The mystery of all is that often He will not bless another until we pray. When we pray, His love flows through us to the other person. Unbelievable at first, but true. I can attest that on my "heavy days", depressive days, I know that my sadness lifted because someone prayed for me. I know it.

I love yet another reminder from Amy Carmichael in that before we pray, we should first ask for spiritual understanding and direction in prayer because this is the confidence we can have in him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us: and if we know that he hears us whatsoever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we desired of Him.

My next challenge for us is to begin a prayer journal. To write down requests for others as the Lord brings them to light and to mind. Lots of great resources out there, Intimacy with God: Your Daily Guide to Prayer, by Tara Furman is wonderful. You can purchase it by clicking on Proverbs31 link to the right (thanks for the suggestion Amy). Also, if you happen to live in the Hillard area, Northwest Bible Church is offering a study about prayer in studying Psalms. It begins Sept. 9, you can contact the church office at nwbible.org for more information. Thanks for taking the time to join me in my journey today. God Bless!

As for me, far be it from me that I should sin against the LORD by ceasing to pray. 1 Samuel 12:23

Pray out loud?!

If you would ask me about my knowledge and ability to pray, I would say that I stink. Up until about 5 years ago, if you would ask me to pray aloud in front of a group (even a group of 2), the people-pleaser in me might think about saying yes, but my answer would be, "no."

To give you a little background, my family attended a Lutheran church when I was little (family tradition), then we began to attend a Methodist Church, and by high school we attended a Nazarene church while I attended a Catholic high school, so, I affectionately label myself a denominational mutt. All in all, it was a great experience to observe differences, similarities, and authenticity amongst each group. When it came to the issue of prayer, I saw and heard only a few select pray, and that would be the men that stood in front of me on the "platform" each Sunday morning. I viewed prayer as reserved for a few select, for the intelligent, and for the well-rehearsed, you see, I didn't know about the relationship I could have with a Jesus that could be my personal friend, guide, coach, teacher, and father.

So what is my "take" on prayer now? It has become an integral part of my day. Did it happen overnight? I don't think many things do, not anything that has long-lasting, transformational effects anyway. We are so wired to want the immediate aren't we. Am I over a fear of what I will say as others "overhear"? Nope. But something comes about when you learn or practice anything in life - you stretch your legs, you become more comfortable, somewhat more confident, and along the way advance in the skill. Have any of you watched a small child's attempt to swim in a pool? Have you then observed them at their attempts the following summer? How about a few years to follow? Micheal Phelps began like this :)

However, we, as adults, struggle with something that children haven't yet - more years of life. Years filled with joys and real pains, hopes & dreams and doubts, successes and failures, disappointments, betrayals, and bitterness. How often or how easy is it to allow these experiences to frame our walls, our defenses, and our mind-sets? May I humbly suggest that these life experiences may be just what holds us back from our desires to even attempt to pray - too many what-ifs. May I suggest that there is another who would like nothing else than to plant that voice of doubt, masking it as your own voice, and justifying your action in closing the door on a relationship with your Heavenly Father, your creator?

As the Lord leads, I plan on delving into several aspects of prayer in attempt to deepen my understanding so I may pray more effectively and draw closer to Him. I believe so often we think of prayer as something we do to break through to God - to get his attention and to get Him to listen to us. But intimacy with God is His idea. He has taken the initiative, and prayer is His gift to us. It is an opportunity for us to respond to His invitation to intimacy by calling, crying, and singing to Him (for me, the latter is mostly in the shower and the car). Will you join me in this challenge? Start small. Choose a close friend, perhaps a spouse, perhaps a child, and simply say the words in your heart, whatever they may be, to Him. He doesn't care what you say, he just loves that you do.

Lessons from Beijing

I don't know about you, but I just can't get enough of the Olympics! I wish by body would obey my will to stay away each night, but alas, I've needed to check out nbc.com in order to receive my 411. There are so many things I find fascinating about this best-of-the-best competition - they reveal the heart of the human spirit, the drive of the will against all odds, and the humanity of our best moments and not-so-best moments, but for me, they drive home some very amazing lessons.

This past Monday, Aaron happened to be out of town, so I decided to jump on the treadmill after the kids went to bed. Quite an experience to be sweating along with the TV as I watched athletes sweat away too. I watched the beach volleyball ladies, yelling and clapping as if my voice alone would be the one to carry them on to victory, as if when they succeed, I earned the right to join in their success as well. It got me thinking about how many hours they have dedicated to their sport/sports of choice. A sport in which they were created and born to do (Usain Bolt), whether it be their body type, the encouragement of their hometown surroundings, or even their family heritages passed down (Nastia Liukin). Their amazing abilities to focus under pressure, their motivation to keep pursuing for a comeback, and their humility as the microphones are pushed into their faces, generally right after their rise or fall, gives us such a glimpse into ourselves.

It's was a tradition in our family to gather around the TV during that 4 year (now 2 year) span. I have very vivid memories of certain events, and even more memories of the discussions afterwards. As a family involved in sports, one had a sense of the culmination of hours of preparation for a few minutes of performance - hopefully, peak performance. Yet, as many times as you may practice, the chance of mistakes that could happen loom over you like the darkest cloud on a blustery day. Days where no matter how strong your will, your body simply betrays you. My heart just collapses for Lolo Jones as she was seconds away from feeling that gold around her neck, to mistakening catch her toes on the second to last hurdle, able to finish, yet placing sixth. To be that close, to have trained that long, to have overcome a tremendous past, to endure endless hours of pain and even injury with a set-goal in mind, to make a simple mistake and be "out" (USA relay 4x4 relay teams, both men AND women who dropped the baton). The "if-only" hanging over your head and not being able to have a re-do, devestating.

So then what? Some say, I want another chance, and rededicate another 4 years of their life - wow. Are we able to keep "rededicating" our lives, mistake after mistake? I pray that Lolo doesn't lose sight that she is sixth, yet sixth IN THE WORLD! Can she see that because of the outcome of her event, another girl was able to have her story. Can she see her value and worth in the eyes of the one who gives us our eternal worth? I pray she does. I pray that she may know the one who extends to us everlastings re-dos in the form of forgiveness, knowing our fraility, our sinful nature, and our tendencies to satisfy ourselves. In fact, someone who loves us enough to be willing to die WHILE we sin. (Romans 5:8)

So what about the billions of us not called to be a US athete? We have a race we're running as well. 1 Corinthians 9 tell us:

24Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.

25Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.

In our pursuit to set our minds on our goal, to pursue with determination, passion, ferver, and in a steadfast way, where do we turn? Colossians 3:2 tells us to set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. 1 Peter 1:13 states, "Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed."

Lord, in a world that pulls me to set goals for my own personal success, help me to consider to set my mind on you instead. In a world that tells me to store up treasures here on earth, will you remind me that these "things" do not last? Help me to set my mind on you in order that I may store up treasures in heaven. I have a desire to see a reward now, will you help me to remember that the greatest rewards are yet to come. I love you. Thank you for loving me.

Armor of God - Part 6

The armor of God. Do you know, I've now typed this phrase several times, and one little, two-letter word just struck a chord - of. Not from (though it is given), not in (as if we need to do the work), not even through (again, implying only through our works can we "wear" this privilege), but of God. Our bodies, our hearts, our minds, our souls, our armor - invented, planned, prepared, crafted, enjoyed, in the image of God. WE are the armor of God. Gotta chew on this for awhile.

Well, let's take a look at this final piece of armor, and then we'll review (one of those teacher words that I can't get away from!) Once again, let's crack open good ol' Ephesians 6. Let's meander down to verse 17, shall we?

Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

The sword - ah-ha! What visual pictures does this word conjure up in your mind - those with boys know the meaning of this word well, knowing a sword can be any type of inanimate object that gets jabbed into the air, maybe visions of Pirates of the Caribbean dance in your head? Perhaps a picture of the Olympics and fencing enter in, Princess Bride anyone, or maybe Zorro? I'm always amazed at the confidence and agility of swordsmen (or ladies). Knowing that at any moment, the same action that could impale your opponents may come right back and impale you. How so with the word of God? Could it be perhaps that the same truth we are empowered with can be used against us when twisted and manipulated from the evil one? Reckless words pierce like a sword (Proverbs 12:18)

The word of God is described as alive, Hebrews 4 :12 states that the word of God is living and active. Sharper than a double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow. As I see it, the word cuts and divides, just like a sword. It divides truth from lies, perfection from humanity, fact from opinion. In this changing world, it's something we can bank on. It's the infallible, inerrant word of God (to quote my pastor :)

What I also find interesting is that each piece of this armor alone cannot work without the other parts. The helmet does not work without the hands placing it on the head, the belt of truth does nothing if there is no waist to wrap it around, the body will fall without a shield to protect it from flaming arrows of deceit, and the sword will not distinguish truth without the hands being able to pick it up and the mind to use it correctly.

In her book, Believing God, Beth Moore states, "the way I see it, God gave us two hands. If we want to live abundantly and victoriously, we must pick up both the Shield and the Sword. To pick up the sword without the shield is to shrivel and dry up in the land of legalism. To pick up the Shield without the Sword is to try walking by faith on quicksand." Is it fair to suggest then that God wants us to use them in tandem? I can you you that until 3 years ago, I lived by faith, but not by the word. I really did stand on quicksand, in fact, sinking all the way to my neck at times.

So if we know this, why do we not pick them up, stand in them, walk in them, in fact, realize they are of God? May I humbly suggest our stinkin flesh. We want what we want, often times that means what is easy, comfortable, convenient, and feel-good. We don't wanna crack open that dusty book. When we do, it's for a quick-fix. We place expectations on "it", daring "it" to show us all that others proclaim it to be. It's simply another cardboard cover with pages, words, sentences, paragraphs, and those weird numbers all over the place, how in the world can it be "alive"? Yep, I've had those same thoughts, they appear very true. But let me ask you this, where did we get this information, what's our source? Can we answer this? Do we want to answer this?

I can tell you this, I don't know much, but this I can say. There is no possible explanation for the changes that have come in my life from anything that I alone have done. I've tried it my way, I've willed it, I persisted in it, I've searched for it, I've been left exhausted by it. This word of God has created such a craving in my life that I wake up thinking about it, I talk with Him often about it, I emplore others in conversations about it, and I even tackle projects that I never thought possible about it (ahem...blogging). All this in pursuit of more of Him. He is just insatiable to me, I can't get enough. It's the strangest, hardest, most not-understandable, most thrilling adventure in my life thus far, who woulda thought.

Alright, let's wrap up. In my feeble attempt to help create a visual to aid in memory, let's review from head to toe:

• Helmet of salvation
• Breastplate of righteousness
• Belt of truth
• Hands holding the - shield of faith, and sword of theSpirit
• Feet made with readiness

Pretty awesome picture isn't it. As I picture this person, I also see an expression of quiet confidence, calm and relaxed facial features, and a slight smile from knowing what has come with their equipment. Hold onto this picture with all your might, we need it to not only survive, but to thrive. To live life, not without stuggles, but with joy. And even more importantly, to pass on the good news that this is available for all people, yes all.

In conclusion, just wanna give you a peak at the following verse (18). It says, "And pray in the Spirit on all occassions will all kinds of prayers and requests." I'm gettin an inclination that perhaps we could delve into this concept next, one of my favorites... prayer. God bless!

Devotion

Just wanted to take a moment and share an amazing devotion I read yesterday from Sarah Young's book, Jesus Calling:

Expect to encounter adversity in your life, remembering that you live in a deeply fallen world. Stop trying to find a way that circumvents difficulties. The main problem with an easy life is that it masks your need for Me. When you become a Christian, I infused My very Life into you, empowering you to live on a supernatural plane by depending on Me.

Anticipate coming face-to-face with impossibilities: situations totally beyond your ability to handle. This awareness of your inadequacy is not something you should try to evade. It is precisely where I want you - the best place to encounter Me in My Glory and Power. When you see armies of problems marching toward you, cry out to Me! Allow Me to fight for you. Watch Me working on your behalf, as you rest in the shadow of My Almighty Presence.

Revelation 19:1, Psalm 91:1

The good, the bad, and the ugly

How does one live a daily life with God? What does it actually look like? What do we we do with all the "stuff" that happens to us? Why does it seem that the harder I set my mind on him, feelings aside, the more I get knocked down? At the end of the day, is this pursuit worth it?

In full confession, I actually want to admit a struggle I've had as of late. Ask me just 2 years ago to admit anything I'm struggling with, and you would have received the "ARE YOU CRAZY?" look. Funny thing is, the more I search for the truth, the more I realize I've actually believed lies for the duration of my life. I believed (and still do at times) that admitting weakness, sharing my ugly thoughts, showing that in fact, I am not capable of keeping it together, could cause others to think less of me, to loss respect for me, and to subject myself to the thoughts and glances of disappointment and shame. I not only believed this, but I lived in fear of it for most of my life. I became a professional mask-wearer. I played the game so well, in fact, that I no longer knew who I was, I became only what others needed me to be.

As one who's been there, done that, I can tell you that as God has peeled back one layer after the other, I've experienced something that I never expected. Where I assumed condemnation would reign, instead I found freedom. Where criticism loomed, I found love. Where ostracism was spoken in my ear, relatability, authenticity, and a true realness has prevailed. How? I started to know my Jesus. How? I started reading, I started joining a study, I started surrounding myself with women who were real, welcoming, and unbelievably wise. I started asking questions, I recognized a thirst, and I began to allow my heart to fill up with the only one who can pour his living water into my dried up soul - my savior, my Jesus.

Wow, wasn't expecting to go down that road, but here we are. So my recent struggle - my ugly words. Lately it hasn't taken much for me to quickly point out the faults, mistakes, and failures that my children have made, over and over again. (Can you say, projecting!) I recognize it, I repent, I apologize, I'm genuinely sad about it, and I do it again. And I do it again. In my never-ending quest to "figure myself out" to fix things and move on, this one has stumped me. Why do I continue to do this?

As we walked to the park, I simply decided to say, Lord I'm going to thank you today (failed to mention anything specific). I'm simply going to chose to praise you today, even if I don't feel like it. I can't understand right now (several facets of my life), but I'm going to trust you. At lunch, I read a blog entry that put it to words for me. As you have a chance, click on Marla's site, her entry entitled "depleted, defeated, deflated". She directed me to a passage in Romans 7 (this is a good one!), taken from the Message:

What I don't understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise. So if I can't be trusted to figure out what is best for myself and then do it, it becomes obvious that God's command is necessary.

17-20But I need something more! For if I know the law but still can't keep it, and if the power of sin within me keeps sabotaging my best intentions, I obviously need help! I realize that I don't have what it takes. I can will it, but I can't do it. I decide to do good, but I don't really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don't result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time.

21-23It happens so regularly that it's predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God's commands, but it's pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.

24I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question?

25The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.

Pretty awesome, thank you Paul! So, back to my first question posed, how do we do this thing of life with God in our everyday moments? Today I started with this... Good morning God. I'm telling you right now, I'm going to mess up today (sin). I'm thanking you in advance for loving me. Now, please, help me get out of bed. (Last morning to sleep before our precious Emma starts kindergarten in the morning, sniff, sniff).

How did the rest of the day turn out? Too amazing to explain. What began as waking up to sibling squabbles yet again, turned into several moments where he showed evidence of his sheer presence again, and again, and again - starting with my attitude, showing me a quarter, greeting me with a stranger's face, helping me to shed a tear, calling a friend in need, listening to my children say thank you, helping another child compose an apology letter, listening to prayers, catching up with my husband, enjoying a run while watching an amazing beach volleyball game, and now allowing time to post. Not quite what I expected this morning. I'm coming to learn that the unexpected is what I cherish the most (this coming from a person who craves predictability, only God.)

Is it worth it, this pursuit of Christ? May I say this again, and again, and again - YES, YES, YES. I keep finding myself saying this, but the lowest moments I now feel as one who has placed Christ back in the center of my life, I would ask for again. I would do this if it means I get to spend more sweet moments with him. If it means I get knocked down, side-lined, or knocked out, I will get up and I will do it again. In light of what my Jesus has done for me, it's the least I can do. Have a delightful day with Him!

So sorry for this lengthy post, next up will be the last post for the armor of God series (really!)

The last hu-rah!

Just wanted to share some fun pictures from our recent trip, over the river and through the woods to Grandmothers house we went!

We decided to finally make the annual trek to Cleveland, seeing as how it's the last week before school begins (crazy!) Always mixed emotions for me. Summertime is my favorite and time spent with all three is priceless. I know the upcoming routine of school will be good for all of us, yet I know I'll miss the lazy mornings and our days spent in the lazy river at the pool.

Just a few highlights from our trip I wanted to share with you:

• My parents - ever serving their neighbors and local church body, continuing to model Christ's love with every breathe they take
  
• No matter how old you get, you can always go "home"
• Sweetness to my ears... "I love you Papa", "I love you Grandma"
• My father's love of nature and adventures - our hunt for round rocks, big leaves, bark, worms, and even a frog (big growth for Emma who faced her fears of bugs and slimy creatures head-on!)
• Seeing the joy on their faces as they ran from ride to ride at the Kiddie Park (Brynn's first roller-coaster!) Her words... "That was fun!" Wanna do it again... "NO!"
  
• Our family silliness - wearing hats at Steak N' Shake
• Enjoying a trip to the zoo with the girls while the boys enjoyed a leisurely bike ride (16 miles, that is... Dad's years of coaching and encouraging affecting the next generation, continuing the legacy - great job Austin!)
• The love of my parents... the same love my children get to witness... priceless.
• Falling asleep in attempt to watch as much of the Olympic coverage as possible, sharing in the amazement and inspiration of athletics, a family tradition
  
• Running the streets of your home town, reliving past memories... weird, yet comforting at the same time.
• Walking into the same pool office that you spent your childhood summers at for years... watching my three children follow me... blinking back 17 years of my life (gulp!)
• Pulling out of the driveway, this time owning a mini-van instead of a mini-wagon... no bumping the gutter this time!
• Conversations full of wisdom and real-ness...I wish I had another week. Love you Mom and Dad! Happy 35th Anniversary!

Swirling thoughts

Ever have those moments, part of the day, or the entire day sometimes where random thoughts just bombard your mind? Well, in an attempt to unload a few, here we go.....

• Wow, the clouds today are something to behold!
• The kids and I had a great day at Zoombezi Bay yesterday, trying to hold onto the summer. I can't seem to get enough, maybe that's why I have this physical exhaustion today?
• School shopping - supplies - check, everything else - nope.
• A dear friend will watch her 20 month old endure another surgery on Monday.
• What should we grill for dinner tonight?
• Our friend Stef just returned from a week long stay at the hospital - Happy Birthday Friend!
• The Olympics - wow! Opening ceremonies... simply amazing! Who has enough creative juices to think up these things? While taking in all the artistry, I couldn't help but be antsy in anticipation of the athletes to enter and the show to begin! I love learning about the history and culture through the commentators as well. The sheer numbers, the costumes, the coordination, the practice, the amount of money spent - yikes! Luckily they re-ran them again this morning, my big mistake was to lay my head down on a pillow. Without DVR, we gotta catch things as they're happening.
• Our home sale has been pretty quiet lately...
• My heart goes out to my best friend, my husband, still experiencing some unrelated pains.
• Still experiencing my lactic acid build up from a run this morning (ugggh).
• I just came back from my sister's home, going there with the intention of walking their sweet dog Bo. After searching every possible place I could think of - no leash. No cell phone either, what to do? Decided to try the no leash thing..he's a great dog. Started off with a walk, turned into a jog, a pause to water the bush, then there were barking dogs... okay... a three-house walk will have to do for today.
• The kids are anticipating another trip to Jungle Jack's landing. Gotta love running from ride to ride for 5 hours, all for the low price of $6 - summer-time!
• Planning on packing the bags once more for a trip to Grandma and Grandpa's this week - we all love it, spoiling comes so naturally for them.
• Meet-the-teacher this coming Friday - YIKES! This year, I will see 2 of them off for a full-day, and the little one off for afternoon preschool - bittersweet.
• We picked all the pears from our backyard tree today - anyone need some? (please!)
• I'm thinking about finally getting around to that final post on the Armor of God... maybe later.

Lord, of all the details that need to get taken care of as a wife, a mom, a daughter, a sister, and a friend, I praise you for being the Rock through it all. I thank you for the many "pictures" of life that flash across my computer screen throughout my day. What a gift to be able to capture a moment in time, and to remember them in the days and years that go by (especially with this short-term memory brain of mine). This is the strand of yesterdays that make up the tomorrows. Thank you for allowing me to trace your faithfulness by looking back, erasing the doubts I have today. I commit to you my passionate pursuit of you.

Armor of God - part 5

Okay, back to our regularly scheduled programming... but aren't side-trips just so much fun! The Lord has truly stretched me in so many areas of life, but one of the most prominent has been learning to be flexible. You'd think motherhood would cure me of my agenda seeking, planned, and structured mind-set, but sadly enough, Mommy just gets more determined to stay on course. Luckily, I've learned, veering off-course, not only gives me wonderful new scenery, but helps me see His way, which is usually 100 times better than my pitiful plan. How much have I missed out on for so long? I now know (and have to remind myself) that I would have missed out on the blessing of this better plan had I held onto the reigns and stubbornly plowed ahead with my plan irregardless. Ironically enough, it's less stressful, less-worrisome, and just plain more fun to let someone else be in control.

If I had my way, I would have plugged along with this six part series, start-to-finish, and held off on other posts until "later". The problem with this is (just as with scrapbooking), I miss out on the thoughts and feelings of the moment as more time passes and my mind gets filled with other things. (Is this why we take so many pictures, trying to capture moments of time?) Yes, life does seem to interrupt my thoughts, yet when I look at it, that's the most beautiful part of it all. It's not a bad thing to have a desire to see something through to completion start-to-finish, but if that's the only things I focus on, I tend to be left with frustration and exhaustion, energy spent just spinning my wheels. Let's spend some productive energy today.

Today, we're going to take a look at the helmet of salvation. Ephesians 6:17 states

Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the spirit, which is the word of God.

Let's focus on the first today, and we'll round out the second one tomorrow (unless otherwise interrupted :) What struck me just as I was typing this was that very first word - take. In a similar fashion to verse 16, God calls us to take up the shield of faith. He is more than willing to give, but we need to take, or receive. The notes in my study bible state, "The helmet protected the soldier and, under certain circumstances, helmets provide a striking symbol of military victory."

So, we can protect our heads (minds) in victory with our salvation. What is salvation? Using biblegateway.com, I found this definition, "This word is used of the deliverance of the Israelites from the Egyptians (Ex. 14:13), and of deliverance generally from evil or danger. In the New Testament it is specially used with reference to the great deliverance from the guilt and the pollution of sin wrought out by Jesus Christ, "the great salvation" (Heb. 2:3)

I also found some other verses that give us a greater picture of this concept of salvation:

Exodus 15:2
The LORD is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation. He is my God, and I will praise him, my father's God, and I will exalt him.

2 Samuel 22:3
my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation. He is my stronghold, my refuge and my savior— from violent men you save me.

Psalm 18:2
The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

Psalm 27:1
[ Of David. ] The LORD is my light and my salvation— whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life— of whom shall I be afraid?

Psalm 28:8
The LORD is the strength of his people, a fortress of salvation for his anointed one.

Psalm 51:12
Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

I love that we can walk in victory, in the joy of our salvation. We can be victorious (and that's not what the devil wants us to know!). We can be confidently confident in this. Wherever life finds us today, we can know, the battle has already been won. Let's pick up our helmets, protect our minds, and let not the joy be stolen away from this day, the Lord has given us.

This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. Psalm 118:24

My constant companion

Yesterday morning, I woke up with a heaviness. Ever experience that sensation that your muscles are physically weighing you down, that it takes a tremendous effort for you to begin and continue to move throughout the day? For me, I believe my heart donned this "cloak" of heaviness in an attempt to carry it for my husband. You see we woke up yesterday, knowing that in a few hours, he would be wearing a hospital gown, comfy socks with no-skid treads, and a shower cap. I knew I would watch as a stranger pushed the love of my life down a strange hallway and out of sight where he would not have any recollection nor knowledge of the experience of leaving that room minus one gall bladder.

I wasn't expecting this heavy cloak. I usually enjoy my role as the encourager, the peace-maker, the positive thinker. In all honestly, I had to rest on the role of quiet-supporter, lifting up prayers as fast as my heart could lead. I had not expected the intensity, the gut-check of watching your loved one and you being separated in that scene. The greater reality hit me, we would be leaving that evening, on the road to recovery. A few days of discomfort for years of a healthier body - minus one non-functioning organ. What about the countless other stories in that hospital that day? Would they be going home? What does life look like for them upon their return?

As I sat by myself in the waiting room, people, chatter, conversation, announcements, television, and snores could be heard all around me, yet a sense of "silence" was the only sound I heard, for they were sounds of people I knew not. Before this silence threaten to consume me, I made a decision. I needed a distraction. I desired to think of good things, right things, truths. I decided to get "lost" in a book. It is there that I met my friend, there where I felt wrapped in the warm of familiarity, there where I realized, I was not alone. I drew on the strength from my constant companion, one that I can always be real with, one that doesn't need a thing from me, one that always listens, one that truly loves - My Jesus.

One of the many things I read yesterday, just touched me so personally. Sarah Young has written a devotional book called Jesus Calling, taking scriptures and writing in such a way that is such a personal invitation to me each morning. Here's what He said to me:

You don't have to chose between staying close to Me and staying on course. Since I am the Way, staying close to me is staying on course. As you focus your thoughts on Me, I will guide you carefully along today's journey. Don't worry about what is around the next bend. Just concentrate on enjoying My Presence and staying in step with Me.

Jesus you ARE my all, you ARE everything I need. Whenever I feel disappointed, hurt, or angry about situations or people around me, help me remember to ask for help, to cry to you for wisdom, patience, and understanding. Lord thank you for blessing me with a soul mate, someone to love unconditionally, who loves me back with an unconditional love (a love that is concerned for me as he lays in a hospital bed hooked up to IVs). Thank you for the breath in my lungs today. Thank you for another day to give you the glory. Thank you for being my constant companion, my best friend.

A fresh look

Beth Moore....wow. The Lord led a friend, and this friend led me. Where to? Grove City Church of the Nazarene, Friday evening, a telecast from Louisville, KY to 715 satellite churches from around the country - Canada, Guatemala, Japan, Puerto Rico, and at least 2 others that I can't recall - 70,000 women in all, for what? To get a fresh word from God. Did we? Well, I for one, not only got a fresh word, I've been chewing on quite a few for 24 hours now, meaning I got much more than one!

Living Proof Ministries, if you're not familiar with them, check it out. I've included Beth Moore's site to the right, just take a moment, you will definitely be blessed. Well, last night Beth walked us through the parable of the sower found in Luke 8. Let's look at Jesus explaining this parable:

11-12"This story is about some of those people. The seed is the Word of God. The seeds on the road are those who hear the Word, but no sooner do they hear it than the Devil snatches it from them so they won't believe and be saved.

13"The seeds in the gravel are those who hear with enthusiasm, but the enthusiasm doesn't go very deep. It's only another fad, and the moment there's trouble it's gone.

14"And the seed that fell in the weeds—well, these are the ones who hear, but then the seed is crowded out and nothing comes of it as they go about their lives worrying about tomorrow, making money, and having fun.

15"But the seed in the good earth—these are the good-hearts who seize the Word and hold on no matter what, sticking with it until there's a harvest.

I chose to use the Message version here because last evening, they put together an amazing power point presentation with the very same words, became so fresh for me. Now, this harvest that is quoted lastly, refers back to verse 8 where is talks about the seed that fell upon good soil. "It came up and yield a crop, a hundred times more that was sown." Beth expounded upon this hundred fold, or one hundred times over concept. Basically the Lord states that anything you lose for my sake, I will return 100 fold. Loved when she said, "God does not exaggerate."

Anther place that you find this concept is in Genesis 26:12 when it states, "Issac planted crops in that land and the same year reaped a hundredfold, because the Lord blessed him." Keep in mind, an average crop yield is 7-15 times. Here's my summary: 1 seed sown = 100 x impact. What is this seed? A look back on verse 11 tells us this seed is the word of God. God's word having maximum impact in our lives.

She went on to speak about how do we yield a hundredfold harvest? First, treasure the wonder. Verse 10 in Luke 8 states, "The knowledge of the secrets of the kingdom of God has been given to use." Secrets! Sweet! We are privy, or allowed access to the knowledge, insight and discernment of God. Basically God gives us revelation of the revelation.

She went on to a word study of 2 Timothy 4:16, which talks about being "thoroughly equipped". After breaking down the word meanings for us ("artios" and "arti"), she concluded with the words: competently competent. We can claim this and walk in this!

Secondly, we yield a harvest when we protect our hearts. Verse 12 states the devil comes and takes away the word from hearts. She actually verbalized my thoughts... can he really do that? Yep. Verse 5 talks about the birds eating it up. The devil wants to make sure we are ill-equipped for our calling.

The devil's theme - in order that they may not...
Jesus' theme - I came that you may have.... (John 10:10)

The devil wants to take the word before we assimilate it into the marrow of our bones. We need to chose to "hide them in our hearts" in order to state that these are NOT up for grabs.

Whew, I could go on, but I think I'm supposed to stop here. Beth goes on with 5 more phrases. Check them out on her site, and keep pursuing Him!

Amazing things to ponder...an amazing God we serve.

A little bit of color

Are anyone else's flowers just thriving this summer? As I watered my plants today, I just couldn't get over how well my flowers are growing. Some summers just don't bring enough rain, and the summer sun seems to scorch them, but this year, the sun is just multiplying the blooms like crazy! "Why is that?" I asked myself. Why is this year different than others? Got me thinking....

Well, the soil itself is now a year older, more nutritious and more fertilized from years of cultivation, added peat moss and top soil. The flowers started this season with a great foundation - fair weather conditions, days of rain, cooler weather, just the right amount of sunshine. Because of this balance, the right amount of soil, rain, sunshine, and shade (from our thriving river birch tree) the tiny plants thrived. The more they thrived, the more motivated I became to continue their cultivation. I wanted to see more growth, so I used miracle-grow, and I took time each day to add water, to pluck off dead foliage, and to weed as needed. As a result of the time and energy devoted to these little plants, they grew! And though they don't need as much constant care at the moment, we are able to reap the blessing of the amazing color and brilliant blossoms that have resulted.

As you followed along, did you draw any correlations with your spiritual walk and growth? My mind tends to think along these lines. When I have the right balance in my life, what are the results? When I take time to cultivate my relationship with Jesus every day, what is the result? When I support growth with study (soil), when I add actions of loving my neighbor (water), when I obey the Son (sun), what harvest does this reap? As I grow closer, how does this effect my motivation to keep pursuing him, no matter how many slugs and pests threaten to invade my soil? How do I respond to the weeds that may take root right next to me?

Who says creation doesn't speak to you? Guess I got an earful today, thanks for your wisdom today Lord. You never cease to amaze me! Another added bonus... my children are watching, my children are talking, my children are joining!

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

Armor of God - Part 4

Welcome back, thanks for taking the time to join me in delving into His word today! I thank you Lord for being patient with me as I've whined about this "assignment". I'm learning so much from this book of yours, one I've neglected, fumbled, yawned, and again whined over many times. If slow and steady wins the race, I guess I'm heading in the right direction. Through one discovery at a time, I'm falling head over heals in love with the brilliant Author.

Okay, to review Ephesians 6, we've looked at our armor being the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, and our feet fitted with readiness. Let's look at verse 16:

In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.

A note in my study bible states that this passage describes the large Roman shield covered with leather, which could be soaked in water and used to put out flame-tipped arrows. Has anyone thrown a flamed-tipped arrow at you lately? Maybe not in the literal sense, but how about a flaming shot of hurtful words, scorching silence, or even written words that have still left a trail of fiery debris on your heart? Maybe these arrows aren't from a person, maybe they are a thought. A thought that leads to more thoughts, and more and more, leaving a devastating wake of ashes in it's path (you don't notice it though because it's behind you). Who do you think is the source of these thoughts? Perhaps yourself, or perhaps, the liar himself is speaking, even convincing you that indeed you are rightly justified in your conclusions and have every bit of ground to stand on in your own independent and self-sufficient way. But let me ask you... where does this leave you? How does this feel?

I hear a song on my ipod this morning by Chris Tomlin. The main chorus says, "If God is on our side, who can be against us..." In my search for the reference, I came across 260 verses that contain the words - who can be against us, wow, really. Here are just a few:

Deuteronomy 20:1 - When you go to war against your enemies and see horses and chariots and an army greater than yours, do not be afraid of them, because the LORD your God, who brought you up out of Egypt, will be with you.

Deuteronomy 20:4 - For the LORD your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory."

Deuteronomy 28:7 - The LORD will grant that the enemies who rise up against you will be defeated before you. They will come at you from one direction but flee from you in seven.

1 Samuel 2:25 - If a man sins against another man, God may mediate for him; but if a man sins against the LORD, who will intercede for him?

1 Samuel 17:45 - David said to the Philistine, "You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the LORD Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied.

How amazing to be able to bank on the fact that God has our back. I'll take those odds any day! Just remind me in my stubbornness or my self-pity state that he does, in fact, give me that shield. It does me no good if I don't actually pick it up. Thanks for the reminder Lord. Just two more items to look at, next in the helmet of salvation. Until then, don't forget to pick up your shield today!